I consider myself a skeptic and a cynic, and I’m not really proud of either trait. These are the logical outcomes of a logical personality, and I’m not proud of that, either. In fact, there are days that I wish I were not so logical; it’s a burden in a world that lacks common sense! And it can cause me to be cold and clinical when I’d much rather be warm and compassionate. Also, I’m sure it drives some people crazy.
So I was surprised at the the direction my thoughts took when I recently scrolled through my Instagram feed. I follow Jon Gordon, a best-selling author and motivational speaker, and I’ll be honest and say that some of the rah-rah, positive attitude stuff makes me roll my eyes at times – not specific to him, but that genre of posts. (I’m not proud of this, either! I don’t want to be that kind of person!)
Here’s the post that made me think:
(More total honesty: that word MIRACLE made me think of the Miracle at Jordan Hare. I can’t help it – I’m an Auburn girl.)
My logical self wouldn’t ordinarily find a cynic and a skeptic to be hopeful. But you know what? I am! That’s why I persevere through books I don’t particularly enjoy — I figure there has to be some redemption in there somewhere! Alas, sometimes there is not. It’s why I’ll almost always gut it out and finish every episode of a television series season that has been recommended to me — holding out hope that it’s worth it. It’s why I will rip out a knitting project over and over if I can’t get it right. I’m hopeful that one of these days, I will figure it out. And it’s why I didn’t quit on my marriage or give up on some very important relationships that were really hard once upon a time. I’m not proud of this trait either; it’s just how I’m wired, I guess. And I’m not the One who did the wiring!
Maybe it’s a by-product of that stubborn streak that so frustrated my mother (and shhhh…. came from her! Thanks, Mom!).
So, anyway, that’s a long way of saying that, at fifty years old, I’ve learned something new about myself through glancing at an Instagram post. Life is funny, y’all.
And now I will say to you in the spirit of rah-rah cheerleading and positive thinking (but seriously), if you’re in a hard season, DON’T GIVE UP! Don’t quit right before the lesson is learned or the person changes his heart or the book gets good or the Lord shows His stuff. Pray for perseverance. Wait. (My logical, practical self is compelled to include here the caveat that if you’re in an unsafe place, don’t wait, get out! Otherwise, hang in there. Pray. Obey. Wait. Believe.)
Don’t give up y’all,